I have realised that although I have a few small videoclips of him singing, as yet we don’t have a picture of our Roki In Song.
When he first came to live with us he didn’t talk much. Silenced by fear he made a few noises to express pleasure, barked if you asked if he wanted food. Gave a little rumble if you scratched his tummy or ears. It took some getting used to and realising that it was simply his way of expressing happiness. He makes some funny sounds.
Kato used to sing, we encouraged it from the very first and he loved to sing the song of his people sometimes at the most inopportune moments. He also loved to sing Happy Birthday and would burst into song after the first word with recognisable words throughout.
When Roki came into our lives, we decided to teach him to sing too.
The first time we all howled together he looked confused and I think so did we. He was two years old. This little puppy voice which had not been encouraged to speak came out, sounding very hoarse and croaky but his tail wagged and his face lit up when he realised that he wasn’t going to be told off.
We made it our mission to let him sing every day, so in the mornings when everyone is awake we all sit on the bed and have a Song, the family or pack (if you prefer) all joining in and I tell him that I love his singing and he is a very good boy.
His voice is getting deeper now that he is four years old, not a sudden change like when Kato became ill, but the strength from within that resonates, it comes from deep down. It is soulful yet happy and the whole bed shakes when he sings now, the paws bounce as he throws his head back, just like a wolf his neck extended to allow the depth of his voice to come out and travel through the air and the tail still wags.
He has learned to talk to us more now too, answering questions and saying Hello.
Although he was adopted by us you might think that he has been here all his life. We are very pleased and proud of the boy he has grown into. Adoring, loving and full of character and as gentle as a lamb with friends and family whilst protecting us from intruders and predators as well.
So as I return home after a month in the Beautiful Queensland Coast with my dear friends, I am struck by how down to earth I felt about this wonderful place. I immediately felt homely in this unknown place. As I left I knew that I would miss the family so much and that saying my Goodbyes would be difficult. But we are all happy in the knowledge that this will not be my last trip to Australia. It is just the beginning of my travels to this part of the world. I guess that hasn’t quite sunken in yet as I sit on the first leg of the flight home. I have rung my partner and heard that they are alright (as alright can be) at home and as my friends family will all be asleep now having journeyed back to Eudlo, where they all stay, part of me is wishing that I was also tucked up in a nice warm bed, but that is for tomorrow.
As I figure out in my fuzzy head a way to get my family over to Australia in one piece, if only it is his dream too, I could perhaps satisfy my wanderlust with regular trips if some of my contacts might put some work my way. Time to make a few more phone calls I think.
Today, my last day in Australia, we visited Coolum Beach, a lovely area which was absolutely littered with blue jellyfish, which apparently have a vicious sting to their rather lengthy tail.
Since I was attacked by a green ant only yesterday, I was not inclined to repeat the exercise with one of these beasties today, so we dodged rather a lot of them along the beach, but the waves were high, we wrote messages on the sand, whilst the boys played and ran up and down. The sun was shining and I looked at the iridescence of the water as the tides crossed my path. It was beautiful and for a moment, I lingered there not wanting to leave.
Swept away in the moment I was transfixed by the waves which reached the shore. Only being brought back to the present when the boys called out to us.
We went on to Coloundra, which is a favourite since my friends Mum currently lives there and it is where they began their time here, just after emigrating. There was a fish restaurant which served wet fish too, it was on a main road, not particularly inspiring as places go, but my meal was enjoyable nevertheless Calamari and Swordfish steaks served with chips and a side salad.
I was quite pleased to see a Pelican fly over the car as we arrived along the beach front and he rested upon the wall of a block of flats. I managed to get a photograph of him before we left. Another thing that I will remember of Coloundra.
There is snow back home, just a few small flurries here and there so I am told, but I hope that he brings a warm coat to the airport, despite the layers I have packed, I know that after the warmth of the Sunshine Coast I am really going to feel the cold at least for the first few days. I may even have to resort to Thermals, but lets hope not.
So what will I be taking with me from this trip?
Positivity, that there is so much that is better and that is actually available to me in this life, not having to wait until the next one to experience it all.
Do I believe in reincarnation…
Hmm, although I have long thought that we get one life and should live it. It’s one of those things that I hope that we do get some kind second chance if the odds have been against us in this life thus far. Not necessarily if we live a pure and chaste existence, but if we do good unto others, try to help people along the way and such like.
I have met up with someone who gave me some wonderful advice regarding writing. She has been an inspiration for looking for the good in things, even when I have felt really low. To meet her in person after all this time, could have gone well, or not and neither of us were sure. We arranged to meet in the last week of my trip. Over a coffee and cake. It was an absolute joy to spend an hour or so with her, chatting about all kinds of things and finding out that we got along just fine. It seems that we have indeed become friends and we will be keeping in touch.
As we drove back from the beach and I squashed all of my luggage into my cases in the hope that I didn’t have to take anything out. My beach combed shells carefully placed in the luggage so that they will not get broken. The beautiful “Blue Shell” given me by my friend, who said I should have it. We sat outside on her verandah in the sunshine and made jewellery from the Quandong stones which we had collected from the garden. Or rather, I drilled the holes, my friend strung them and made them into two rather lovely necklaces, which are enormous, almost architectural in their style. But I also learned that sacred jewellery is made from them by the Aborigines.’ The kids decided since there were so many of them left over, that they would also make some one for their mum and one for a friend and each other. We had picked up and cleaned up much more of them than we first thought from the garden and yet they still litter the floor at the back of the house, there are probably thousands of them and there will be many more when fruit season comes around. It is a shame that I did not get to see the blue fruit, but they have long gone, only the debris remains. But we have seen the jewellery made by the monks at the nearby Buddhist Temple, Chenrezig up on the hill nearby. The only difference being that they have added a bead and tassle to their ones. Ours are simpler, but hang beautifully as a double necklace, made by my own dear friend. There is one for me and one for my mother. Along with a bracelet one of the boys and I made from all of the beach shells and coral that had natural holes in.
Handmade Quandong & Beach Jewellery
I tasted custard apple for the first time today, it has an interesting taste, I think I am more taken with the Mangoes and also the quite amazing Fruit Salad Fruit, a strange looking fruit which as it ripens and sheds its outer skin, you are left with something which resembles a skinned banana, but you can taste so many other fruit.
Fruit Salad Fruit – Monstera Deliciosa
We each described it differently after a taste, one thought pineapple, another melon, and another banana.
Jack Fruit
I tried Jack Fruit, which is another native one, it looks a bit like a hedgehog on the outside and has a pungent smell to it when it is ripe, but makes an awful mess and leaves a glue like substance, its sap which is difficult to remove, on everything that it touches. It was my friends’ first taste of the fruit too, she had read that you could prepare it and use it like a vegan version pulled pork, which is very popular. It had a sweet taste in its raw form, which was quite pleasant, definitely fruity. But once cooked takes on a whole new persona. It lost its appeal somewhat and then only took on the taste of the spices and sauce which it was cooked in. So isn’t something I’d be likely to try again.
I thought that I would do some things differently whilst I was away, but didn’t. Firstly I thought that I would write lots of poetry, but didn’t write any at all.
I also thought that I would meditate but although there were times when I sought peace and calm I did not, not even once! Well, not intentionally although the calm swept over me every time my toes hit the sand.
I thought that I might struggle to drive a manual car again on roads which I do not know, with the different layout and rules, but I took to it once again like a duck to water. One drive out in the car, ten minutes in and it all came flooding back to me, the first drive in an unknown place. The South of France all those years ago, it was as natural as breathing. I soon learned some of the routes to enable us to get back home. We did have the mobile sat nav, but when the signal was non existent or the batteries low, we somehow still made it back.
The fact that I was open to trying new things, experiences and directions, meant that this was the holiday that I needed it to be, filled with wonderful places, beautiful sights, friendly and welcoming people. It was a very pleasant surprise to be wished a safe journey, by the people I met around the town before I left. They had observed my arrival, as a tired unwell traveller and observed the change in me finding my feet and would all stop to talk and find out what I thought of their little town.
The nearest town Mooloolah is more like one of our villages, spread out over a greater area, but with similar facilities to a British country village. A few essential stores and a fuel station, but there is a good network of regular trains going past at the bottom of the garden. I have never seen such lengthy freight trains, but maybe next time when I return to this part of the world, I will take a journey on the train with my friend.
As I said Goodbye to the house, the area, my friends and their transport which has carried me safely on this journey, I watched the greenery whizzing by as a passenger in the car, thinking of many of the things that have captured my heart about this place and the many things I have yet to see and feeling quite emotional about leaving.
I will return one day, to my friends again and this place which has captured not just the imagination, but reignited my spirit of adventure and also a little piece of my heart. There is so much to see and I have barely scratched the surface, I simply have to see more.
I can’t pinpoint exactly when it was that I thought again about Reiki and Chakras and focusing on getting better in whatever way I could but it’s pretty recently.
After a while of being unwell you start to look at any options which might be open to you, I guess that you become more open to the options too and try to simplify your routine accordingly. But it seems to have coincided with the shift in my life that I was also welcoming and appears to have begun.
Things are on the up. I feel it and have a really positive and upbeat mentality for the first time in a while. Brushing aside my somewhat cynical thoughts of what might be and throwing caution to the wind, well not exactly as I don’t want to bring out the self destruct button. But in a controlled way I am considering new things and making more plans.
I am going to have a holiday, which always brightens me up although the thought of leaving my loved ones back here also kind of fills me with trepidation. I am not a seasoned traveller. I always wanted to travel when I was younger, you know travel safely to far flung places and see the world but never got off the ground. My inbuilt craving to be loved saw me spending my time instead with unsuitable and and often manipulative boyfriends after an early relationship ended. I also needed to support myself so didn’t escape it all as it wasn’t financially possible. It is only since I am lucky enough to have a partner who wants me to travel the world and embrace new things who sends me off on little journeys from time to time that I have been able to do so.
There is something wonderful about him that makes him say. Haven’t you always wanted to go to that place? You should, we’ll do it. Wanting me to see some of the wonderful places he has been to for myself, camera and notebook at the ready. He knows that I will be enriched by the experience. He always knows just the right time that my body, or soul is needing something and I come back with renewed vigour, excitement and strength and loving him for sending me away. I miss him like crazy when we are apart and worry about him, but yes he is able to cope without me and I get a heroes welcome from him and the dog when I return.
But lately I got to thinking about the benefit of Reiki and the fact that I have had only one session and it made such a massive difference to me. It was about 3 years ago. At the time I also learned to channel that same energy after the session. I read some things and tried to learn more about it and when I was unwell I found that if I meditated and placed my hands upon the chakra points of the body the energy helped to alleviate pain. At the time I was going through a very frustrating situation in my workplace and couldn’t speak up about the problems there as my voice wasn’t being heard by my superiors. I had terrible sore throats for a couple of months. It turned out that my throat chakra was blocked. I have had a problem with lumps in my throat ever since then which have never really gone away. I did get checked out by the hospital but they could not do anything about it. However I often felt that the pain that I had there could be alleviated by the warming energy when I meditated and placed my hand just in front of my throat for about 60 seconds. I did eventually get the opportunity to speak up, but by then a lot of damage had been done both mentally and physically by the toxic environment I had been in.
Recently I thought about that healing energy again and how I craved to become well. I also thought about the crystals that I have in the house and how they can also assist me. A few of my friends have found the benefits of crystal healing and although I haven’t thought that I have used crystals in the past. They have been in my life for longer than I thought. Those odd stones purchased from time to time or found on my travels. A pretty thing that has caught my eye or appeals to the touch, that the hand is drawn to and rests upon. I don’t know all their names. Somehow I have been drawn to the ones that have been laying around in the house and I also did one of those questionnaires recently to see if my chakras were blocked as I just wasn’t getting better. I wanted to know what I could do to improve things.
Where there’s a will there’s a way as the saying goes.
It turned out that my heart chakra was blocked. I needed to open myself up to more love. But also to look beyond myself for it. To not be limited by ego, to love unconditionally and see the beauty in all things again. It is regulated by the Thymus gland whose purpose is to regulate the immune system. I have had a problem with my immune system for the past few years and have recently been working on strengthening it. The Thymus gland also governs hormone production and bodily functions. I’ve had IBS for many years but I’ve also noticed that I often have physical pain in between my shoulders which travels through to my chest at the front. It cramps and the only way I have found is to soak in a hot bath until it releases. I’ve had six months of pain in my breasts which I recently was told at the hospital was caused by cysts. My doctors have suggested that a lot of pain is often caused by psychological ailments which I’m not happy to accept. It makes me feel as though they think I’m nuts every time they say it. Then I find out that there is yet another physical reason for the pain and they backtrack again.
I read more of the article the Heart Chakra purpose is noted
• Love for oneself and others
• Relating, relationships
• Compassion, empathy
• Forgiveness, acceptance
• Transformation, change
• Ability to grieve and reach peace
• Compassionate discernment
• Centre of awareness, integration of insights
“When the Heart chakra is blocked you may also feel emotional and withdrawn” it was then I realised that this has been an issue for longer than I thought.
So what do I do now?
To release the blockage it mentioned use of certain essential oils, such as Rose, Geranium, Jasmine, Ylang Ylang and Bergamot. Most of which I had used recently when making gifts at Christmas time. Some of which are contained in a gift from a friend given to me for my Birthday last month.
It suggests wearing rose quartz, the crystal to bring more love into your life. Hmm I thought, I have a necklace sitting around I should clean it up and wear it. It has adorned an ornament for many years in my lounge and I haven’t worn it. Tarnished by misuse it has sat around the lady who sits crossed legged in my lounge, purchased long before I ever thought about yoga and the effects of it upon the body along with some Chinese I-ching coins bought for Luck some 20 years ago. She looked after them all for me. I have taken the necklace and cleaned it occasionally but recently unravelled it, washed it and placed it outside to cleanse it on the last full moon along with the other crystals I could find in the house. I was told to use the crystals I was drawn to in some way, to hold them or wear them. So instead of replacing the delicate chain around her neck, I put it on mine and it has stayed there.
My mum who makes beautiful crystal jewellery often will change some of the beads in a bracelet for me based upon what she feels I need at the time when she makes a repair. Meanwhile
the tarnish has gone from wearing this necklace and showering with it on, it is silver. I have noticed it’s beauty although it looks slightly out of place with the gold that adorns my neck daily I have left it there. The other night my partner noticed it and said “what a beautiful necklace is it New?”
I laughed as I told him I needed to open my heart to more love recently so I thought I would wear it. He gave me one of those funny looks that I get when he knows more than he lets on and goes with the flow.
But I can’t deny that I have felt much better in the couple of weeks since wearing this Stone around my neck. More loved and loving generally. I have become more accepting of my body and the fact that although it doesn’t work in the way that used to, it still carries me around and I need to look after it. Kind of nurturing towards it. Considering it’s needs and where I can change things for the better. More loved and loving towards me.
Things are changing for the better and we are both thinking more positively. Instead of dwelling on our misfortunes I have been giving thanks again for all that is good and focusing on each and every thing that goes our way and positive outcomes. I used to spend a lot of time thinking in this way when things were better in the past, but somehow it kind of disappeared under the fog of the past few years and I couldn’t seem to shake it off. I am returning to conscious thought and how it affects us.
I think I have been able to let go of the grief that has consumed a huge part of me for a couple of years. It turns out that I have been living in grief for such a long time. Grief for me, trauma, for situations and for loved ones and I think that I have finally been able to release myself from it. I will no longer allow it to hold me back.
These small steps all add up to a long walk, but I feel that at last I am heading in the right direction now.
As she lay down to sleep, her eyes closing from tiredness.
She asked for her angels to protect her and her loved ones. To keep evil away so that they might be safe and happy and they gain rest and recovery from ailments and worries.
She can see flowers, as though someone has scattered them above her, burgundy and white but she is not sure what they are.
Once again the buzzing of the nerves through her body, like a telephone ringing in her leg. Starting at the toes and radiating up the leg. The wake up call as it were. Does she have a direct line to them she wondered. Do they answer my call in this way?
She was shaken just once but as though two hands rest on her shoulders, were vying for her attention.
Just as she wanted to sleep. Ah insomnia my old friend, so you are back again she thought.
So she waited, willing for sleep to arrive and as she did so it began. The swirling lights on the inside of her eyelids and all around her as she breathed slowly and rhythmically and tried to relax. I think she knew what to expect. This time green mixed with blue, white and gold. Like her very own Aurora Borealis happening right there above her head, a long awaited dream coming true.
Opening her eyes she was not surprised that as before she was wide awake again. Suddenly no longer tired, the body momentarily invigorated by the experience. It happens again and she can still see the lights above her. Reassurance that I did not dream it.
The dog awakes from the other room, not excited by this spectacle, he does not run to look. She does not even know if he sees it or senses it. He takes a leisurely drink and comes to settle at her side just as the light show ends. But she cannot sleep and neither can he, he returns to the darkness of the next room huffing gently that his own sleep was disturbed again but not really knowing why. He will be back when it has settled down. As her body cries out for he sleep and let it wash over her, like the waves of tiredness, rest assured he will be there a furry assistant watching her back. As she drifts off and she looks up the reassuring image before her, that of two hearts in the doorway, beating and pulsating where once was darkness stood.
Some time passes and some sleep is gained before swallowing hard as the noise of piano keys crashing is in her ears. This sudden noise a rude awakening as she is awake once more but comforted by the breathing of the hound who has returned to the side of the bed she realises the message is loud and clear, that love is strong and all that matters.
And after staggered sleep she wakes to the blessing of being able to welcome another day, the sun rising on the new horizon colourful and bright and offering her new hope. Thanking them for the comfort they bring her on the darkest night. The gratitude that she holds for these special moments, the thoughts that she has been part of something special. A shooting star perhaps, flying through the cosmos on its way to somewhere new. A new galaxy to explore, reborn with new light to shine.
To follow on from my last post. I thought a bit more about why I didn’t post last years quotes.
Other than it feeling like it was so last year…
And last year was not a good one in so many ways so I guess I am consciously trying to move on from it. At the beginning of the second week of 2018, things are already changing for me and I am feeling a whole lot more positive and seeing things in a new light.
It is not the normal type of new year positive thinking that we set out to motivate ourselves with after a heavy Christmas. This feels massively different as though something has shifted and I truly hope that it has.
All I can say is if this is the shape of the year to come, then I will be happy and some of my other wishes for this year may come about.
So here are some more of the quotes that appeal to me right now. May they offer a pick me up if and when you need one, inspiration to a lull, motivation when you need it. Reassurance if you are in doubt.
It is that time of year, the very last bit where we cannot help but to take stock of the year that has been and think about our hopes for the new one that’s coming.
What we wish to let go of, the old habits the things that no longer serve us.
And so it began on the early hours of this morning. The brain dump. You know those snippets of thought which do not give a clear picture, they are just random things flying around my head. A thought here and there which doesn’t make sense and then is gone forever.
Letting go.
So what am I letting go of?
Firstly, the thoughts that I am a sick person. This is a big one, I know it to be true but it is not who I am, therefore it should not shape me.
In the past few months I have got nowhere, it has held me back from living a life the way I want to and although I have rested the body and the mind I have felt defined by it and that should not be happening. I have relied upon Drs to find and treat the cause of illness and they have failed me, pushing me from pillar to post as they tell me that it’s not what they think it is, whilst not finding out what it actually is that has made me so suddenly and inexplicably ill. I do not fit in their box. So they have left me out in the cold to fend for myself and all that time has been wasted and I am left doubting my sanity and my longevity.
I am Me.
I am still the person I used to be, but I have grown. I have awakened parts of me which have been sleeping. Hidden from view for so long I had forgotten that they were there underneath all of the other stuff that has been going on.
I am still a loving, caring, partner and friend, daughter, mother. I am a great listener and confidante. Someone who offers careful advice when it is sought. Who will happily teach what I know to others if it helps them. In return I ask for consideration, for care and occasionally thanks for my efforts. It does not make me a bad person, I do require validation to know that I am not wasting my time and know that I am doing the right thing.
I am letting go of the victim inside, as I said to someone recently, that is in the past. Long gone and I have dealt with it and the fallout. Again it does not define me for that is not who I am. I have been victimised for the past few years and had some of the darkest thoughts of my life whilst I struggled to deal with the fallout from it. That is not who I am. I want to move on from that now is the time. I have battled it and the depression which comes in that package and I want to move on. Stronger from the experience not allowing it to hold me back any more.
I have done my grieving. For the Loved Ones we have lost, we cannot bring them back. Only the memories remain, sometimes a tear will fall and catch me out, but I will not wallow in the depths of grief or dwell on the circumstances which caused the loss.
Too much time has been spent dwelling on the past. The past is gone. It is time to move on, metaphorically and physically.
There is a whole world out there that I have yet to see.
But I don’t need to see all of it. Some of it the way that it is run, the damage that is being done to it and the people that are hurting each other in it, are not what I need in my life. I owe it to myself not to be drawn into this first hand. I have figured out that I annoy always strong enough to cope with the fallout.
As with so many things, I need to protect myself better. I need the connection with the earth that surrounds us so I am planning to spend even more time in nature and learn more about my foraging journey, it has taught me so much in the past year alone, given me medicine to heal my body and options with which to feed my family. I will grow more in whatever space I have, plants to nurture and care for us.
Friends and family. Over the past year, I have taken time out when I needed to. There have been times when the only people I have seen or spoken with for weeks have been my partner or my mother. I love the bond that I have with them both, but just sometimes I need other people in my life too. There have also been times when their company has been more than enough for me and I have sought, or even craved silence and solitude. They have often fought to understand that, but have given me space nevertheless. I want to see more of my friends this coming year, the ones who are still there or me and haven’t fallen by the wayside whilst I have been ill. The ones who care enough to make the time and effort that is needed to maintain a friendship. The ones who are not phased by my strangeness, the new things I want to try and still embrace me for it. My sisters and brothers, not bonded by blood but by shared interests, a love of life and all that it holds for us.
So as I attempt to let go of all the things that no longer serve me, a decluttering of the mind, body and spirit. I am starting to feel as though a weight is starting to lift.
The light that surrounds me, I need to let it in, it can only shine if it has a power supply. That has to be me, no one else. I have to make that happen.
I want to inspire again. Teach again, be a mentor to others. Share knowledge and help others grow and heal.
I think that in doing so, I will also be able to heal, for I am not yet complete in that process and do not have to do that alone. With the support of others so much more is possible. I do not have to fight things alone. I am not alone, there are people dealing with the same problems, probably also thinking that they are having to deal with it all themselves and that is not the case. Someone out there knows your pain, they also might know how to make it better.
Divide and conquer springs to mind. Divide the problem and we will conquer it. As they say a problem shared is a problem halved. Although that isn’t always the case, it can often help so talk to people, if not in person then at least online.
So what am I looking for at the end of this year?
Closure on so many subjects.
I do not want to take the things that have ruled me relentlessly over the past year into the next one. I’d like to say that they have no place in it but as many are still work in process, I think the key is not to let them dominate.
There are things which are yet to conclude, but the wheels are in motion, which means that I am not standing still, helplessly waiting on others to do as they should.
Next year I have to go out there and get it, whatever it may be. Grab the bull by the horns and steer my life in the direction it needs to go. To make progress, however small the steps at first. It is important for me to remain moving, not get set in the concrete caused by fear or trepidation.
I don’t yet know how, or what. But I do at least have my why…
If it is all left to chance, then there is a lack of direction and that easy come easy go doesn’t really suit me of my needs. I like the reassurance that there will be provision for what is needed. Food on the table, bills getting paid and flying along by the seat of my pants is not the way forward for me. It’s too stressful, it has caused more arguments and upset in the past 12 months than we have ever had. So I need to fix that and I need to do that soon.
I have been the breadwinner over the past few years and to take an enforced step back from that has caused such strain that I have often felt broken and helpless. Flailing around drowning when we should be treading water. So if I am well enough to find a job, if it pays the bills then I will give it a go. If it is an unqualified job, with no responsibilities then it will be less stressful and I may be ale to rebuild myself to management level again at a later date. Physical capability might not yet allow me to follow my business dreams but I will hold them in my heart and mind and if I can start as projects or hobbies then I can build on those skills for later.
They are my dreams and I will not just give up on them. So I intend to follow some of mine this year.
To all the people who have made my life brighter this year with their writing, their images, their ideas and their inspiration.
Yes I mean you!
The readers, friends who cajole, inspire, support my ramblings and my thoughts however dark or bright they might be and who comment and share in the moments with me.
I have not written as much this year as I did last year. I am disappointed about that but my health has changed the way my life was going and I have had to learn to adapt to the way things have become. The new normal for me for the time being. I do not know what next year will bring. I only hope that it brings better health, less stress and more happiness for all of us. I hope that I will write more next year, both poems and happier posts, sharing good news with you all. This year has been a new kind of difficult, challenging in so many ways but I am hopeful for a brighter future.
As for Christmas in our home I figured out a few months ago that this Christmas was not going to be the usual what can we all buy each other that we don’t really need scenario. I have not had a proper job for two years so I informed family and friends that if I couldn’t make it, then I wouldn’t be doing it. Thankful that they accepted this I set about making their gifts and I have included here some of my snapshots of the things I’ve made.
So I embraced my creativity in other ways. Thanks to the people in a group or two that I joined on Facebook I have learned how to make things with foraged fruit and herbs, some of which will be given as gifts. I remembered that I enjoy cooking and making things so tried my hand at biscuits, truffles, gingerbread and cakes. I also made oils for cooking, jam, herbal massage oils and teas. I have made scented bath salts, Jewellery and Christmas decorations. I am also using recycled packaging wherever possible for these gifts. I also joined a group which showed me so many things that I had forgotten like ways to reuse and rethink and repair and recycle. I have so many wonderful ideas planned for next year that I want to try.
I have been cooking for weeks, trying things out and some have been gratefully received and others have driven my partner crazy. If I fancied making something new I set about finding a recipe to give it a try. He could not understand why I wanted to mess about with it all, but on limited means and I have made the most of the opportunity having learned new skills this year and revived older ones which I have forgotten. I spent a wonderful day recently with my sister where we made biscuits together, it’s something I don’t think we have ever done, we learned together and I loved the process.
When I have not been able to sleep, often In pain I have got up and made something. It hasn’t cost me much, only time and energy. Sometimes on my feet for hours, I have been exhausted but nevertheless for these simple things I have had a sense of accomplishment, which has been so important to me.
Homemade gifts are not everyone’s cup of tea. I have noticed a shift in the past few years where it has been more acceptable than it used to be, for that I am extremely grateful. I think it is lovely when someone has taken the time to make you something and it’s appreciated it is much more personal. I understand that not everyone has the opportunity or the skills to do that, but if you do then why not? It has brought back the real meaning of Christmas to me and I have made my gifts and are giving them to special people with love. So far they have been happily received and compliments abound. Especially with the foodstuffs.
This year we are at home in the South, much as we are missing our beloved Scotland I have dreams of a Christmas spent in our cottage of the future, especially when they play the reruns of the film The Holiday on television. I want to decorate our little place with things from the garden and the woods, home made decorations and lights on a tree a roaring fire in the house and the smell of woodsmoke and pines, while I cook the Christmas dinner, all snuggled up together with the family. I still have those dreams I’d like to fulfil.
So whatever you are doing for these holidays, however you choose to spend them. I hope that you are with people who mean a lot to you and you spread a little happiness.
As we look forward to a new and exciting year ahead, things can only get better.
So we are now less than a month away from Christmas and I am wondering if I should decorate the trees? I was thinking that I might make some tiny handmade decorations for these little ones, although they will have to be weatherproof as these two already live outside.
These babies were grown from seeds dropped from pine cones collected from our home in Scotland by some people who are very special to me and have now moved to the other side of the world in Australia. Before they emigrated they gave them back to me and one day when they’ve grown they might be taken back to their homeland. Meanwhile they are about 12 ins tall, keeping me company in the South and reminding me of home and them.
As we get nearer to Christmas I will miss my friends even more and cherish the memories we have of last year when I got to visit them for a few days before they went. I am lamenting the fact that this year I won’t be able to send the silly gifts and home made things to one of my dearest friends, but I will hold them close to my heart and as always send them love. The distance is just a number, until we meet again.
Today, my last day in Australia, we visited Coolum Beach, a lovely area which was absolutely littered with blue jellyfish, which apparently have a vicious sting to their rather lengthy tail.
Swept away in the moment I was transfixed by the waves which reached the shore. Only being brought back to the present when the boys called out to us.
The sound of plastic luggage squeaking in overhead lockers.
I can’t pinpoint exactly when it was that I thought again about Reiki and Chakras and focusing on getting better in whatever way I could but it’s pretty recently.
It is that time of year, the very last bit where we cannot help but to take stock of the year that has been and think about our hopes for the new one that’s coming.
byindiablue 